Being assertive is showing you are a Man! Women are tired of us pansy ass “nice guys” who are afraid of them. It is time to step up your assertiveness and show you are a man!
1. Order for her without coming off like a misogynist.
Ask a woman what she wants or is going to order before the waiter comes (preferably after you have already decided your own order). When the waiter comes to get your order you can give him both of your orders.
You can even beat the waiter to the punch by asking her after your order “Is there anything else you would like?” and it gives her an option if she changed her mind.
2. Choose your seating location, don’t ask her to make your decision.
If you are going to a bar, theatre, or anywhere else where you have a choice of seats, choose confidently where you want to sit. Start walking over to a spot and say, “Let’s sit over there.”
Remember if a woman doesn’t want to do something it is her job to say “No”, you don’t have to keep checking in with her to see if everything you are doing is ok.
3. Assume she will, don’t ask permission
Ask her out by saying: “Thursday night at 8pm, let’s go to my favorite bar in the city for a drink.”
Avoid “Would it be ok if I asked you out? Or got your number?”
Tell her: “It was really cool meeting you, I’d like to get your phone number”
Avoid “What are you doing this week, would you like to go out with me?”
Say to her “I’d like to take you out, how bout I pick you up at 7 on Friday?”
Confidently assume she will say yes and go from there, the rest will fall into place if you approach it this way.
4. Ask a woman out on the phone, not text.
Get her on the phone to ask her out. Doing it over text is such a cowardly way to do it. The only time I break this rule is if she always texts me back instead of returning my calls, then it is fine. Also this doesn’t apply after you have gone on more than a few dates.
5. Be busy, don’t drop everything for her!
Nothing is worse than her knowing you have every night available to accommodate her schedule. Being assertive also means you have a life that you enjoy. Don’t break previous plans to go out with a girl EVER! Leave room in your schedule for her but don’t cancel plans. Instead make sure you make plans with her early in the week before your schedule (or hers) fills up.
Being assertive with women is not about being overbearing. It is saying what you want and leaving room for her to object or provide an alternative if she needs to. Don’t be a jerk about it, just be more decisive. Stating “I think we should go to….” is always better than getting stuck in the rut of “What would you like to do?”