When my marriage ended, I entered a period of discovery and change. I had a moment that many people can unfortunately relate to. I sat up in bed one morning, the house was quiet and empty. I was alone in my head, and had no choice but to face facts that this was my new reality. I sat there, and realized that I had to make a choice to follow the path of anger, of blaming others and self pity, or to follow the path of growth, of knowledge, of realizing my role and how my actions helped bring me to this point. Of course I made the right choice, but followed the wrong path. I wanted to let go of the anger and hurt, but couldn’t find a way, and I went around in circles for several weeks. But that moment was the crossroad, it was the point where I realized that I had a choice, even though I was not immediately able to bring my actions to bear, I realized I could choose my future. I was driving, not along for the ride. I’ve since come to terms with my anger and the true journey has begun.

For me, step one of any journey is planning, gathering information. I found ‘the community’. NLP, Ross, Mystery, Deangelo where all very appealing. A magic formula that will enable me to get laid whenever I choose. I can memorize 45 ‘patterns’ off the ASF site no problem, I can build a formula where I start at point (A) run ‘patterns’ and end up at point (B)ed. And then there is Juggler and Charisma arts. I can learn how to have a conversation, how to relate to people, all people, and apply those same skills to end up in bed if I choose. Its another crossroad, will I choose to focus on getting laid by mechanically following a formula, or will I focus on relating to people, and get laid as a by product. I’m sure I know logically what the right choice is, and I thank you again for your story. It puts out there the proof, that an AFC like me, could become a social person like you.

On to step 2, understanding the material I’ve read and listened to.

-Andrew

Normally I wouldn’t even bother responding to a comment like this but I want to point out for me the “close” is not as important. I know it will happen so i don’t bother rushing it. That leads to one night stands where you never hear from her again.

Guys who have to have a one night “close” often are just seeking validation, either from her or from the community. Why bother rushing it when one night could become many nights. Even Mystery talks about this, i’m pretty sure it’s called “Buyers Remorse”. Sure i’ve had one night closes before, some even turn into girlfriends. That wasn’t the point of this post.

-Jordon
http://www.pickuppodcast.com

I completely agree with you on FRs being mostly an exercise in you-know-what-measuring unless there’s really a takeaway or instructive content. This FR surely qualifies as the latter. Excellent write-up. I especially appreciate the use of sexual barriers and how you flipped the script on her with respect to having ‘rules’ in the bar. Nicely done brother.

-Jordon
http://www.pickuppodcast.com