Comments on: Technique: Thought Replacement

By: Sharp7

Sharp7 — Sun, 12 Aug 2007 22:03:27 +0000

someone above mentioned how even though they do this, if u woke them up in the middle of the night they would still have the old beliefs.
My solution to this is to ACT ON THESE BELIEFS, thats the key to solidification, that and of course TIME. You need to keep doing this type of meditation until you are presented with a choice, then u have to choose the path that the NEW YOU would make.
if ur belief is that u dont think you deserve a womens time and can’t ask them out, you will not completly get rid of this belief untill u ACT like the new you would, which in this case would be to ask girls out all the time cause you know ur worthy.

just trying to help.
btw i recommend the book “Evolve Your Brain” if you want much more in depth info and i warn you the middle of the book is a lil boring cause its kinda sciencey, but the beginning and end are AMAZING!

By: Mogito

Mogito — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 17:14:19 +0000

Really nice post, and so true. But you could take this a lot further, you’d be amased by how much you can change by thoughts alone. I recommend everyone to go to http://www.thesecret.tv and watch the film, it’s great.

By: SocialHitchHiker

SocialHitchHiker — Wed, 28 Mar 2007 19:18:54 +0000

We all do. I wish there was a magic bullet, but reprogramming myself helped. The other stuff was actually working on my self confidence in various ways. If anyone out there feels they hit a wall with those things I would suggest an actual therapist. They can be very helpful.

Working on oneself is a neverending journey of discovery and re-creation.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Tue, 27 Mar 2007 14:00:56 +0000

After nearly two years of being familiar with the “pick-up world”, I’m capable of hearing out a fellow’s problems and point out his limiting and misguiding thoughts. Most times you see them miles ahead — classic cases of guys not seeing themselves worthy, guys thinking themselves immoral for making a connection sexual, etc.

Only recently I’ve accepted that I have some of those ugly, “textbook case” beliefs myself. For example: I’m not easy on offering a girl to go on a date, cause I see myself in the entertainer role, or I plain don’t think myself worth her exclusive time.

I know the contradicting beliefs and have some contradicting experiences. I can catch myself on “bad thoughts”, “reprogram” myself. But no matter how often I reprogram myself, the bad thoughts are not replaced for good. At the root – like, if you’d wake me up at the middle of the night and ask me – my believes are still the faulty ones.

By: SocialHitchHiker

SocialHitchHiker — Sat, 24 Mar 2007 17:30:06 +0000

It’s the difference between optimisim and blind optimism. Being aware of your flaws are great. Even saying what you say is great, just continue to grow and work on this stuff. When you get far enough along you will see your opprotunities and ways you can do better endlessly. If you still have not gained that awareness in social situations come take a bootcamp, it is one of the most important things i gained was the ability to critically evaluate interactions better.

I find my balance by creating positive statements about my worth, yet being aware of how i can improve my skill. The two are not linked. My skills do not dictate my worth.

By: floyd

floyd — Sat, 24 Mar 2007 05:28:04 +0000

I think those are really good ideas, and I know a bunch of people who have had serious anxiety or depression problems and who have worked on this with their shrinks. But I wonder: Doesn’t critical thought also allow you to isolate areas where to focus your efforts? Example: you meet a cool girl, you try to connect but it doesn’t click. This has happened repeatedly. You can say “Oh well, I know I’m a pretty cool guy with a lot going for me, her loss.” This is what I tend to do in general because… well, because I kindof just know that and believe that. But maybe there is an actual reason why this girl and the ones before didn’t go anywhere. Surely both, eliminating limiting thoughts and asking critical questions of yourself serve a purpose. How then do you think one (I) can strike the right balance?

Thanks,

Floyd!

By: Dan

Dan — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 01:44:23 +0000

Hi Dan,

I think your point about the mind/body connection is important and interesting. It’s the idea of a “mind body connection” that keeps me motivated in school as I work through chemistry and anatomy. I think those are important classes, but they reduce the human body and mind to equations and measurements. For example science is showing that cells, neurons, etc. respond to environmental signals—in other words, how we think—rather than a solely random process based on genetics! I’m psyched for chiropractic school because they devote several classes based on how the mind/body connections direct our health, for better or worse! I just find that so motivating that we have some level of control over all that. Thanks for the post, it made me feel good to think of all this stuff about chiropractic and the connections between the mind and body.

All the best,

Dan

By: SocialHitchHiker

SocialHitchHiker — Thu, 22 Mar 2007 03:34:28 +0000

Roll with it.

ME: What kind of fitness do you do?

Her: nothing

Option 1: I understand that, no matter how much i try it is very hard to get motivated. Lately i’ve been going to a rock climbing gym just so i don’t get bored with my work outs. I’ll tell you though i certainly enjoy my veg out time. What’s your perfect day of vegging?

Option 2: See now that sounds like a great work out, you seriously have to make some videos of that work out routine because women would be breaking down your door to look like you do doing no work out routine at all. Seriously what do you do to stay in such good shape.

I relate or I tease. Lots more options but making qualifications on her isn’t so good.

Dan

By: goose__

goose__ — Wed, 21 Mar 2007 11:47:38 +0000

Dan, what do you do when a presumption fails?

This is what I’ve been doing (and it sucks):
so what fitness do you do?
HB: nothing.
me: you are so lazy! Everyone should workout. I stopped for a few months during the summer and then started going to the gym again, it was great my mood improved so much… [etc.]

This is bad. I am devalidating her choices. J. says people like us for approving of them, and I am standing in judgement, if she’s not comfortable she’s not going to open up.

So what is the template you have for when a presumption flops?

By: thesmoothoperator

thesmoothoperator — Tue, 20 Mar 2007 21:45:21 +0000

Great tips. Here’s something along these lines that have helped me:

http://en.wikipedia.org/w...nitive_behavioral_therapy

It’s real science, as in tested in scientific journals, taught and used by psychologist and psychiatrists. It’s not pseudoscientific junk science BS.

Here’s the book that helped me so much

http://www.amazon.com/Fee..._oe_p/105-9253223-6790017

And here’s another book that deals with exclusively dating

http://www.amazon.com/Int...m_b_4/105-9253223-6790017

Basically for around 5 min a day, or less, I write down my negative thoughts and substitute more rational, logical thoughts. There’s something powerful about writing things down. The Feeling Good book has helped me so much with my self-esteem, self-confidence, procrastination, etc.

If anyone wants any more info, or a copy of the worksheets I made, feel free to contact me thesoulgazer1@gmail.com